Relationships Outside of the Box

Dating and relationship advice for kinky and non-monogamous folks.

Get Two Kinky Dates in the Next Two Weeks

Our free workshop shows you three powerful steps to find a kinky partner online.

We’re building extraordinary relationships in an ordinary world.

Before we go any further, let’s make sure you’re in the right place. Let’s start with who this site isn’t for:

If you:

  • Have preconceived notions of what relationships should look like.
  • Find frank discussions of polyamory, non-monogamy, sexuality, or kink unsettling.
  • Consider advice written for a diverse variety of gender identities, sexual orientations, and races disturbing.

Than it’s probably best for all of us if you leave now.

Still here? Good.

If you’re smart and successful, kinky or non-monogamous, and you want:

  • To find, attract, and keep quality partners without resorting to sleazy PUA tactics.
  • To move a relationship from casual to committed.
  • To have successful non-monogamous relationships,
  • To build the relationships you want, whether for an evening or for a lifetime.

Than welcome. We’re delighted to have you, and we want to provide you the advice you need to build extraordinary relationships in an ordinary world. If you want to learn more, a good pace to start is with our free video on the four biggest ways you sabotage your relationships.

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What People are Saying:

Deciding to learn skills from Touch Of Flavor was one of the best decisions I have made. So very impressed.

Tiffany B.

Baltimore, MD

I did not know how much I didn’t know. Thanks TOF for sharing your insights.

Robert K.

Annapolis, MD

Because of Touch of Flavor I now know what type of partner and person I want to be.

Lee T.

Baltimore, MD

Thanks for helping us spice it up! We are having such a fun time exploring all the new things we have learned together.

Barbara M.

Washington, DC

The Types of Men You Meet in Online Dating

Online dating can be a minefield for anyone. When you’re kinky, and you identify yourself as such, you get a wide variety of messages: hilarious, irritating, flattering, confusing and just plain gross. After a period of time using a popular dating site and a hookup app, I began noticing that most of the men on these sites fall into one of five categories. I have written up these Online Dating Archetypes and their typical messages here for your entertainment.

These Eleven Immature Dating Habits Are Killing Your Chances

When someone we’re dating decides to move on it’s easy to blame them for the end of the relationship. It’s much harder to acknowledge the truth that our own bad habits are often at fault. Relationship after relationship we keep making the same mistakes, and wonder why we keep getting the same results. It’s the very definition of insanity. If this sounds like you, I want to help. Here are eleven immature dating habits that you should start breaking today:

Dating: When Fairness Matters, and When It Doesn’t

We often hear the word “fair” used to describe our dating relationships. Our definition of fairness is often vague, because most of us use the word to describe a sort of ideal, healthy dating relationship without ever stopping to consider what “fair” actually means. Since we view it more as an ideal than a skill we never stop to consider what “fair” actually means. That’s a problem, because if you want to find, get, and keep quality partners, fairness is a skill you have to master.

The Kinksters Guide to Negotiating a BDSM Scene

Consent is important. Super fucking important. In fact, it’s the one thing that differentiates BDSM from abuse.

The concept of consent isn’t hard. But as with anything the devil is in the details.

And when it comes to consent those details are in how we negotiate. Consent is a concept. But negotiation is how we put that concept into action.

We put this video together to teach you good negotiation skills. Watch it. Use it. Share it.

Submissive Dating: How to Attract a Domme (Kinkly)

Finding a vanilla partner is hard, but it’s nothing compared to trying to find a Domme. Dominant women are in high demand, and it’s a seller’s market. But never fear We wrote a post on Kinkly to teach you how to attract a Dominant Woman. Go read it now!.

You’re Not Alone: Finding a Kinky Partner

Are you going to die kinky and lonely?

Finding a partner is hard enough in the vanilla world. But it can seem impossible in the kink world. You want to find a quality partner, but you want to find someone who meets your unique needs. It can be hard to know the best path because most of the information out there targets vanilla relationships.

If you find yourself asking yourself: What do I need to know before getting started? Do I have a better chance of meeting someone online or offline? Where do the kinky people hang out? How should I approach a potential partner?

Then this article is for you.